Hummin' the Health Care Blues...

I am a good U.S. Citizen. I wouldn't do anything to harm the nation
that I love. This great social experiment in representative
democracy that started more than two centuries ago has revolutionized
thought on this planet. Serious bumps aside, it has worked far better
than anyone could have imagined.

But at what point do I break? How many fundamental powers have to be
removed from me before I say "enough is enough?" How much of my basic
decision-making power has to be stripped before I fight back?

The State now tells me what I should eat. How long before they tell
me what I CAN eat? The State strips a sizable portion of what I earn
to subsidize things about which I do not agree. I enjoy the military
and social protection provided by the military; but how much is that
worth when I am reduced to a ward of the state?

The Health Care debate is just the latest mile-marker on an inexorable
road to a Statist Utopia. I'd love to opt out, but I have little
recourse. The Collective doesn't function unless everyone participates.

This Conservative Libertarian is feeling pretty down in the dumps today.

Am I the only one who finds this disturbing?

From President Obama's interview today on CBS, pushing Health Care Reform:

"'I think the best way to fund it is for people like myself, who
have been very lucky and are in the top -- not just 1 percent, but top
half percent -- of the income ladder to pay a little bit more,' Mr.
Obama said.

"Lucky," Mr. President? LUCKY?!

This is the core of the Health Care debate, and so many others. Those
of us who have spent within our means, studied hard, avoided costly
habits, gone to work when we didn't feel like it, and rebutted the
temptation to run up huge debts are "LUCKY?"

You can cut-and-paste anything into "Health Care" above and it applies
in modern political discussion. Those of us who can (barely) afford
health care and other things are "lucky," We just woke up one morning
and found a way to pay the bills. To thank us for our frugality, our
Commander-In-Chief is ordering us to pay more for those who in many
cases made piss-poor life decisions.

I am doing everything in my power not to scream at this line of
thinking. This is NOT why government exists.

I need a beer.

More mindless musings...

From the "No Shit!" file.

"House Ways and Means Committee members are likely to propose a surtax on high-income Americans to help pay for an overhaul of the health-care system, according to people familiar with the plan."

The latest God-complex from Obama

ABC News reported that a senior White House official said the urgency of extending the expiring U.S.-Russia nuclear arms treaty "might mean temporarily bypassing the Senate's constitutional role in ratifying treaties."

Is it just me?

I'm no major Sarah Palin fan, but I have to admit I'm having trouble figuring out the vitriol being spewed in her direction. Hey, lefties---she's damaged goods, OK! She's not going to be President. Lighten up!

Broadcast News

The F.C.C. is being asked to ban the term "midget" from the public airwaves. Expect the vote to come up a little short. Obviously this issue dwarfs all other concerns. Midget.

Good luck with that

The President of the University of Florida wants to cut the number of places alcohol is sold at the annual football game against Georgia in Jacksonville. In other news, North Carolina's legislature is proposing trimming the number of barbeque outlets in the state by 50% and West Virginia is pushing a ban on the sale of false teeth.

I've juuuuust about had it!

***Warning---cranky Libertarian diatribe to follow***

I keep hoping cooler heads will prevail. I cross my fingers and beg that someone stands up in the halls of Congress and says "enough is enough!!" I wait patiently for Jules from "Pulp Fiction" to start quoting Ezekiel 25:17 to my tormentors. But the more I think about it, the more I realize it is fruitless. We are destined to become a (hopefully) benevolent socialistic society. There is no other way.

I'm not going to bore you with the latest projections on U.S. deficit spending in the coming decades. Suffice to say it's bigger than a breadbox. A HUGE friggin' breadbox! The problem is, those in charge of reining in spending must spend to keep getting re-elected. There is no incentive whatsoever for Congress to scale back the candy they dish out. It's what keeps them in power.

For the first time in my adult life I'm convinced that there is no way to stop this inexorable slide. Used to be that politicians could corner the populist market by promising to cut taxes. Not anymore. That means the masses would get fewer handouts from the government. And with more and more people growing up in a world where direct Government Aid is seen as a birthright, the whole "anti-tax crowd," (like me) is becoming increasingly marginalized.

As I've said before, quasi-socialist governments can work; but I want no part of it. I'm afraid my kids will grow up in a nation of sheep. People will be provided for by the government from the womb to the tomb. There will be a greatly diminished sense of self-reliance, almost no concept of personal accountability, and the ultimate feeling that one exists to serve the state.

If I can get a little maudlin for a second, I think this runs contrary to the very nature of humanity. Great things in history have been accomplished by risk-takers. By people willing (by necessity, quite often) to take a chance---to invest their money, time, livelihood, and "their sacred honor" to accomplish something. No great things have been done by people who had little or no motivation to do it.

My fervent hope is that I'm too old to give a damn once this happens full-scale. With the cheetah-like pace we're moving presently, I fear I'll have all of my faculties when it's implemented. I can't wait for the day when the Feds tell me my .38 is now considered contraband. I'm pining for the time when I'm notified that I can't have a government-funded heart operation because I'm too much of a risk.

Until the time I become a ward of the state, I'll enjoy my freedom while I can. I'm getting shit-faced tonight. Anyone care to join me?

From today's George Will article

This about sums it up:

The Obama administration's agenda of maximizing dependency involves political favoritism cloaked in the raiment of "economic planning" and "social justice" that somehow produce results superior to what markets produce when freedom allows merit to manifest itself, and incompetence to fail. The administration's central activity -- the political allocation of wealth and opportunity -- is not merely susceptible to corruption, it is corruption.

Just had to share this one with you.

And this one...

Some random thoughts for a rainy Monday

The makers of Matchbox cars had better earnings last year than any of the "Big Three."

Word will leak of a potential far-left nominee for the U.S. Supreme Court. Obama will then "save the day" by nominating an easier-to-swallow lib.

Large, dangerous, gas-powered tools are God's reward for being a man. Beer, too.

I've grown way beyond weary of Brett Favre's antics. An otherwise splendid career is now tarnished, in my eyes.

From today's George Will column... "New York, which until eight months ago was the financial capital of the world, is no longer even the financial capital of the United States. Washington is."

Curtis Granderson is the best baseball player you've never heard of.

It's hard to say that using marijuana will ruin your life when the last three American presidents are admitted marijuana users.

The new Metallica CD is making me feel like I'm 22 again. My mortgage payment reminds me that it's just a dream.

Is it football season yet?

Beauty Queen Blues

I know, I know. I promised this blog would be more sports and less politics. I lied. Sue me!

The thing is, there's not much worth commenting on in sports these days. Lane Kiffen has been relatively quiet the past couple of weeks, the Tigers have begun their annual "May swoon." At least the Washington Capitals are giving me something to cheer about.

I've been struck the past couple of weeks by the vitriol of the left in response to a polite answer to a loaded question that was leveled at a purty young woman from California. In case you need a recap, Carrie Prejean (Miss California) was asked during the Miss USA pageant whether she supported same-sex marriage. She could not have been nicer as she said, "no." Marriage, she said, was between a man and a woman.

The question was offered up by something named Perez Hilton (see picture on right, if you dare!). I had not heard of this "person" before. I had to look them up. I'm sorry I did. Folks, when your title includes "Gay and Transgendered Celebrity Blogger," you might want to take inventory of how you got to where you are. Famous for being famous? Somewhere Kato Kailen nods his approval.

I like to think I'm a keen observer of things, but I admit I was surprised at the backlash. It's more than just the usual suspects that are calling Prejean the spawn of Hitler. Several members of Congress have weighed in on her. Members of N.O.W. say Prejean should get, "a brain transplant instead of a boob transplant."

Those of you who know me know I'm not exactly a prude. Someone's sexual orientation matters very little to me. I like to make fun of gay people for the same reason I like to make fun of feminists, msyoginists, Christians, Muslims, Mormons, heathens, family members, the Trilateral Commission, Congress, the Freemasons, little kittens, and french fries----IT'S FUN, DAMMIT!

That having been said, the character assassination the left has foisted upon this young woman is remarkable. I could almost understand it if she were an outspoken opponent of gay marriage. But JEEZ! She was ambushed with a loaded question and gave a polite answer! Isn't it refreshing to see someone answer a question truthfully, rather than parsing their response to maximize opportunity?

I'll say this for Prejean---she knows an opportunity when she sees one. The answer may have cost her the Miss USA crown, and the glowing riches that go along with it. But tell me---how many of you can name the winner? That's what I thought. She has already parlayed her celebrity into endorsements. Even Liberty University has offered her a free ride for her Senior year. I wish I could get my kids to say something that would get them a free ride!!

That national "feminist" leaders have not really rushed to Prejean's defense tells you all you need to know about that archaic movement. There are very few entities in social life where extremists rule the roost. Feminism and mainstream environmentalism are two such movements. Thankfully, Christianity is beginning to move away from that, but they have a ways to go.

If this "confrontation" is illustratative of the current cultural wars going on, I'll say this. If my daughter grows up to be like Carrie Prejean, I'll be pleased as punch. If my son grows up to be like perez Hilton, I'll shoot the (censored)!!! Just kiddin', Charlie! But watch your back, boy!!!

Everybody panic!!!

"Is it a pandemic yet?" "Is it a pandemic yet?" "Is it a pandemic yet?" "Is it a pandemic yet?"

I imagine scientists with the World Health Organization are positively tingling these days. They have their "black plague." Or at least they hope they do.

Please forgive me if I'm not ready to stock up on antibiotics, hand sanitizer, Kleenex, chicken soup, ginger ale and Vitamin C. I don't feel particularly compelled to buy in to Swine Flu panic just yet.

I course, if I die from this damn thing in a few weeks, you can file this blog post under "tragic irony."

Scientists who portended the end of the world with the Avian Flu three years ago are crossing their collective fingers, hoping they can say, "I told you so!" this time around. Never mind that Swine Flu has claimed fewer lives worldwide in the past week than has accidents involving donkeys. (true statistic!) The Powers That Be won't let a chance for a good crisis to go unexploited.

Swine Flu may be a legitimate concern, but it's more likely that it's the 2009 version of the "Shark Attack" scare---a scare that was wiped off of the headlines following 9-11-01.

Folks, I'm in the news business. I know that nothing draws listeners (or viewers or readers) more than a damn good headline story. You can't get much deeper in terms of public interest than "National Health Scare!" But lets face facts. How many times have the scientific community cried "wolf?"

And by the way---didn't Gerald Ford cure swine flu when he rolled up his sleeves back in 1975?

Doomsday scientists are swarming around the Swine Flu scare for the same reason that the Weather Channel executives root for maximum damage from tornadoes and hurricanes. It makes them relevant. No one gives a damn about Jim Cantore when it's sunny and 85 degrees. No one calls the Centers for Disease Control when they're feeling fine.

So join me, won't you, in rejecting the hype. That is, of course, until you die in a donkey-related tragedy!

4/16 Plus two

It was a little after 9AM in the newsroom when the AP Alert went off. Nothing unusual there. The damn thing goes off every time there's a thunderstorm in Eastern North Carolina. I dutifully moved to my computer screen and looked. There was a slug.

AP-APNewsAlert- (Blacksburg)

I clicked on the header. It read:

(Blacksburg) -- Shooting at Virginia Tech dormitory...developing...

Given the location and my close emotional ties to the school, I perked up. I was not particularly worried, though. Hey, it's a big campus. These things unfortunately happen. I figured a couple of guys had gotten into it and someone fired a shot or two. The next update came minutes later.

(Blacksburg) -- Shooting at Virginia Tech dormitory...West Ambler Johnston...two fatalities confirmed...developing...

Well this upped the ante. My News Director's brain kicked in. "O-K. Maybe I'll run a state story during my midday news. About thirty minutes later, the ante was upped again.

(Blacksburg) -- Multiple shots fired inside Norris Hall Virginia Tech ...developing...

"What the hell is this, I wondered." Did AP screw up the earlier story? Did they have the location wrong? The stories I was working on concerning two large trees falling in the downtown area during heavy winds got pushed to the back burner. It was forgotten completely after the next AP Alert.

(Blacksburg) -- Multiple fatalities confirmed inside Norris Hall, Virginia Tech campus locked down...shooter unknown...developing...

What followed seemed like a blur. I continued tracking AP and giving live updates on both stations. By noon, we knew this was catastrophic.

It didn't hit me until early afternoon what had happened. Until then, I had kept my professional veneer and reported the facts as they came in---gruesome as they were. It wasn't until I got a little down time and happened to glance at FOX News that it hit me. Seeing those familiar-looking buildings, juxtaposed against the backdrop of the kind of coverage reserved only for events like 9-11 hit me like a ton of bricks. This was MY school! I lived a couple hundred yards from Norris Hall! I had several classes there! Was I ever in the upper floor? I couldn't remember.

After having done news for 20 years you learn to keep stories at arms length. Many of the stories we tackle have strong emotions attached to them, and you would quickly become overwhelmed if you got too involved. I thought I was tough. I thought I could handle anything in a news context. I was wrong.

After about 15-to-20 minutes of watching national TV coverage, I had to go out into the hallway and do something I hadn't done in years. I cried. (only briefly, though---gotta maintain my man-cred).

The days that followed produced a full range of emotions. There was the obvious sadness. There was white-hot anger at the shooter, which quickly evolved into utter indifference. I have yet to get to "forgiveness," but I'm working on it. It also produced immense pride at MY university! What a response from staff and students alike! I'd like to think only Tech could have handled such a situation so well. I pray that we never have to find out.

Other emotions have intermingled in the intervening two years. Disappointment at the family members of some of the victims and survivors who seem hell-bent on blaming everything on the school, and not the gunman. I've also been enraged at those who have used the massacre as a front for their anti-gun agenda. My anger includes NBC for airing the footage sent to them by the shooter. Also, the mindless bimbo posing as a reporter at one of the press conferences who chastised President Steger and Chief Flinchum for not "showing more emotion."

But mostly, I'm bursting with pride today at MY school! It's said that it takes our worst to bring out our best. We certainly saw the worst humanity has to offer on 4-16-07, but we also saw us at our best. God Bless all Virginia Tech Hokies everywhere today! Those with and without diplomas. Ut Prosim!!!

Bye-bye, Birdie.

You'll have to forgive this completely self-serving post. Hey, that's what blogs are for, right? A slice of my childhood died yesterday.

Mark "The Bird" Fidrych was found dead yesterday at his farm in Massachusetts. He was apparently working underneath a dump truck. The truck fell on top of him, killing him.

For one glorious summer in 1976, Fidrych was the best pitcher in baseball. He was also the most colorful. I was eight years old at the time, and was just REALLY beginning to get into sports. To a little boy, Fidrych was close to God. He got his nickname from his resemblence to "Big Bird" on Sesame Street.

It wasn't just the devastating fastball and nasty slider. It was the way he carried himself on the mound. With his curly afro bouncing up and down, Fidrych would sling pitch after pitch, with a pace that would exhaust anyone else. He would meticulously manicure the dirt in front of the pitcher's mount before each inning. He placed the baseball in front of him and talked to it before each pitch! He would bounce up and down like a bunny rabbit when one of his infielders made a play---then would go out and personally congratulate them!!

His appeal to kids was obvious. He was one of us! This is exactly the way WE would act if we were to pitch in a major-league game!

But this wasn't an act. Everyone who played with Fidrych says he had an uber-bubbly personality. He was 21 years old when he made his Major League debut, going on ten! One teammate called him "the most natural and unaffected person I've ever met."

As further evidence of his naivete, Fidrych was a guest analyst on Monday Night Baseball once. During the middle of the broadcast, he said, "Where's the John, I gotta go!" Out of the mouths of babes...

How popular was Fidrych? The Tigers sold out his last 12 home starts. Tiger opponents would request that Fidrych pitch at least once against their teams when the Tigers hit the road, to ensure a huge turnout.

In Spring Training the following year, Fidrych suffered what would ultimately prove to be a career-ending rotator cuff injury. It was only natural the the injury would occur while he was horseplaying with a teammate in the outfield. He was never an effective pitcher again. To make the story even harder to swallow, he was hurt about two years before doctors perfected the now-famous rotator cuff surgery that would have brought that wonderful right arm back to full strength.

It would be trite to say that baseball needs more people like Fidrych, but it does. That unbridled enthusiasm was contagious. I can't remember how many times I asked Dad, "Is The Bird pitching tonight?" I wonder how many kids ask that same question today about Roy Oswalt or Jake Peavy?

The "personalities" we are left with range from assholes (Barry Bonds) to jerks (Randy Johnson), the aloof (Derek Jeter), media-savvy (A-Rod), and incomprehensible (Manny Ramirez.) The closest thing we've had to Fidrych the past thirty years is Kirby Puckett---another one who died before his time. Maybe David Ortiz fits the bill today. I don't know.

What I DO know is that no other sports figure struck this Little League Superstar like Mark Fidrych. Hopefully he's throwing a few sliders today to Ted Williams.

Bullseye!!

It might be the testosterone flowing through my glands. It might be my take-charge foreign policy in dealing with those who threaten us. Maybe it's just the reptilian portion of my brain re-assuming dominant status. But I'm feeling a healthy amount of man-love today for U.S. Navy Seals.

In case you missed it, some of America's finest yesterday needed all of three shots to take out three Somali pirates who were holding an American ship captain hostage. The sharpshooters were several-hundred yards away, perched on top of a destroyer, in pitch-black darkness, riding on choppy waters. They fired once they saw the "head and shoulders" of the pirates. They nailed all three in the head!

In what has to be the understatement of the year so far, Admiral Richard Gortney, when asked how this was possible, said the snipers were, "extremely well-trained." Boo-ya!

It's not often in life that the bad guys get what's coming to them while the good guys escape unharmed. Karma's a bitch, isn't it Pirate-boy?

The issue has shed the light on the problem of high-seas piracy. No, not the fun kind portrayed by Johnny Depp in the Disney movies, nor the ones made famous by Veggie-Tales (see picture). I have noted that the national media has ignored the previously-established connection between piracy as a funding front for Al-Quiada. Oh well. I guess I should expect no less at this point. The Associated Press' Official Stylesheet dissuades reporters from using phrases like "Islamic Radicals," or even "terrorists." Those terms are substituted with euphemstic phrases like "militants," "insurgents," and my favorite, "opposition leaders." Those who control the language control the debate.

Somewhere, Charles Bronson is smiling. This episode ended like all of the movies. Everyone who should be dead is dead---everyone who should be alive is alive. If only things always worked out so well. I'll drink a beer or two tonight for the Navy Seals, Captain Richard Phillips, each member of the Maersk-Alabama, every enlisted man in the Navy---well, you get the point!

Nothin' could be finer...

Well, that was an anti-climatic ending to the NCAA tourney! North Carolina took all of the drama out of the National Championship game. Before I could get to my second beer, the Heels had built up a double-digit lead, en route to a thrashing of Michigan State. Sherman's March to the Sea seemed liked a quagmire in comparison.

That I could have cared less about the outcome shows maturity, I guess. You see, I grew up with a white-hot hatred of Carolina. Got it from my dad. Not sure why, though. Dad didn't have a real favorite college team---he just hated Carolina. I grew up with a steady diet of racially-tinged epithets hurled at Phil Ford; questions about Dean Smith's sexual preference; suggestions about Mitch Kupchak's ancestry. As the sins of the father passed on to the son, I picked up with similar diatribes against Rich Yonaker, Matt Doherty, even the great Michael Jordan.

These days, I can appreciate Carolina basketball for what it is. When they square off against Duke, I don't have a dog in the hunt. My sports vitriol is now limited to watching Detroit Tiger pitchers struggle, Virginia Tech's offensive line acting like a sieve, and line drives hitting me on the pitcher's mound while playing softball.

Not even good ol' standby UVA is worth my contempt these days. There's a part of me that longs for the era when the Cavs were truly hate-worthy. Trust me, though, I'm more than content for them to continue to play the role of Vanderbilt to our Tennessee.

Where have all the evil forces gone in sports? We no longer have the Russians to root against in the Olympics---China just doesn't do it for me. Barry Bonds is "retired." The Yankees haven't won a World Series in nine years. UVa sucks AND swallows in football. Bobby Bowden passed senility about four exits ago.

The closest thing we may have as a savior in this regard is new Tennessee football coach Lane Kiffin. This guy is going to be fun! Check out my friend's blog about the newest addition to the fraternity of colorful SEC football coaches.

My search for evil will have to go back to the political realm I guess. Not too many good guys there. With the new baseball season, and my one-week free preview of the MLB package, I'll have plenty of opportunities to bitch between now and Sunday.

Play ball!!

What promises to be a steroid-free 2009 baseball season opens this weekend. On the upside, it'll be the second season in a row without Barry Bonds' snarling visage. On the downside, it'll be the umpteenth season in a row that my Detroit Tigers have employed a "We don't need no stinkin' pitching" strategy.

It's funny---most of the folks I hang around with could care less about baseball. We're football folk, and fiercely proud of it. While nothing beats a rockin' Lane Stadium on a crisp autumn afternoon, my fondness for baseball comes in a close second. Oh sure, the Grand Old Game has left me hanging several times. The strikes in 1981 and 1994 made me feel like a scorned lover. But my "battered husband" syndrome sends me crawling back each time she bats her alluring eyes at me. (I'm sorry---I've got to go look at a few files in my "Asian Girls" folder).

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Now, where were we? Ah yes---baseball. Since I was too fat to play organized football as a youngster, baseball became my first love. I found that my good hand-eye coordination and quick reflexes were a good combo at the plate. My fat ass relegated me to either Catcher or First Base. My spaghetti-like arm had me stationed at first.

After hitting .737 in my last year of Little League, I considered signing a lease on an apartment in Detroit. Hey, I needed someplace to stay after the Tigers signed me, right?! It was when I tried out for the Junior High School team at Blairs that I discovered I was not going to bat cleanup in Motown. I was introduced to the curve ball---and I haven't touched one yet!

Relegated to a life-long status as an observer, I still followed baseball pretty regularly. As an adult, I've also delved headlong into the history of the game. I now count it right up there with the Civil War as my favorite historical subject. Ken Burns would be proud!

An earlier rant of mine bemoaned the decreasing popularity of baseball, but I understand fully. Baseball is not too easy to follow on television. It's like hockey, in that it's MUCH more fun to watch live than it is in front of the tube. It's no coincidence that these two sports are showing a steady decline in TV ratings, despite healthy attendance figures.

As I get older I find that baseball appeals to my intellectual side (such as it is), while football appeals to my red-blooded, reptilian-brained, cro-magnon side---a side that is still flourishing, thank you very much. Whereas baseball prompts me to nurse a couple of beers over nine innings while munching on peanuts, football compels me to consume large amounts of dead animal flesh and chips, while testing my liver's capacity with concoctions straight out of "The Twilight Zone."

That having been said, "Play Ball!" Unlike the NCAA tournament, this time-wasting activity lasts six months!

Guns in Tennessee??

The Tennessee state legislature is looking at a proposal that would allow college students and faculty members to legally carry weapons on campus. Not that most folks in Tennessee have a problem with packin', but University folk are a decidedly different breed.

Of course, we're nearing the two-year anniversary of the mass shootings at Virginia Tech, a subject near and dear to my heart.

State Rep. Stacey Campfield's bill would allow any full-time faculty and staff with a valid permit to bring a handgun onto their public college campus. The Knoxville Republican says banning guns on campuses isn't banning criminals, only preventing "people from being able to defend themselves."

No one wants to talk about it, but I will. What if someone other than Cho in the second floor of Norris Hall had a gun on April 16, 2007? Opponents argue "he still would have killed a lot of people." Well, is a body count of 20 better than 33?

It's no coincidence that in a similar incident earlier this decade at the Appalachian School of Law in southwest Virginia, two students who had shotguns in their trucks went to retrieve their weapons after a gunman began shooting people. They used the guns to hold the shooter at bay until police arrived. He killed two people. How many would have died had not these "good ol' boys" brought their guns with them---in a blatant violation of the school's "zero-tolerance gun policy," I might add.

Think about it, folks. If we are to believe the liberal's view of guns, it is simply their availability that is a precursor to violence. If so, why are we not hearing stories every day about mass shootings at gun shows, where weapons are readily available? Wanna know why? Because even the most deranged gunman knows that if he gets trigger happy at a gun show, there are more than a few law-abiding citizens that will fill him full of holes.

If you're looking to kill as many people as possible, where would you rather be---at a gun show, or at a place that prohibits guns? Think, folks, think! To put it another way, if you're looking for the best steak in town do you go to a restaurant that has "GO VEGAN" in neon lights, or one that has steer horns mounted above it's entrance?

I realize that's a crass way to look at this. So, sue me.

As we get closer to the two-year anniversary of the Tech shootings, alums like me will deal with a lot of thoughts and feelings. If the tragedy underscores the right we have as private citizens to take reasonable measures to protect ourselves, then maybe all was not in vain. That's a helluva price to pay, though.

Lights out!

This weekend brings with it more than just crappy weather to the Danville area. It also brings what I'm told is the second-annual "Earth Hour." Our friends at Associated Press tell us that the Eiffel Tower, The Acropolis, even the Great Pyramids will lower their lights for an hour tomorrow. The goal, ostensibly, is to raise awareness of Global Warming. What mood lighting has to do with the core temperature of the Earth escapes me, but I'll play along.

For those of you who attend the "Church of Global Warming," this has to be a panacea. The Perfect "style-over-substance" event that has drawn participation from a reported 84 countries! Well, you can't say the Global Warming Alarmists can't get the word out!

Here's my take. I am a left-brained guy. I have seen enough evidence on both sides of the global warming debate to ascertain that no one knows for sure what the hell is going on. As for my personal belief---let's just say I would be willing to lend an ear to the Global Warming crowd, if every proposed solution to the alleged problem wasn't something that would hamstring American capitalism. The Obama administration is already doing a bang-up job on that front.

Folks, the earth's temperature has warmed and cooled for nigh on five billion years now! That's long before Adam and Eve took an ill-advised bite of an apple. Does human activity have an impact on the environment? Yes. Much like pissing in the ocean causes water levels to rise.

This is going to come as blasphemy to environmentalists everywhere, but man's impact on the environment is negligible. Yea---I said it! Think of it like this. The 2004 Tsunami in southeast Asia produced energy equivalent to 165,000 hydrogen bombs! And that was nothing more than a geologic burp! Did the Earth die? No!

On Saturday, instead of stroking Mother Earth's breasts, I think I'll run through the house and replace every bulb with a 200-watt monster. All the better to watch the NCAA tournament with.

Bonzai!!

This year's World Baseball Classic will have a decided Oriental flavor as Japan and South Korea square off in the title game Monday night. They'll be handing out chopsticks at the turnstiles in Dodger Stadium before two teams from the Far East battle for supremacy in "America's Pastime."

This is not some bitter American moaning about our rank inability to accomplish jack-shit in any team sport, other than basketball. Quite the contrary, I LOVE watching the Asian teams play baseball. Their emphasis on pitching, speed, defense, bunting, and raw fundamentals is what Major League ball was like before someone named Babe Ruth showed everyone how to make a handsome living hitting the ball a country mile.

Something else about the Asian teams---you can count on one hand the number of players they have that weigh north of 200 pounds. No steroid-addled sluggers are to be found on either side. Could it be that it takes more than raw muscle to hit a baseball real, real far? This is one case where size does NOT matter. If it did, Tiger Woods would be a mild-mannered office temp, rather than hitting 350-yard drives long and straight.

Another thing to consider about the U.S.A.'s underwhelming performance in the two WBCs is that the concept hasn't exactly taken off here in the states. Be honest, how many of you even knew this was occurring? That's what I thought.

A quick glance at the stands of most any WBC game leads to a lovely view of thousands of empty seats. In the U.S. games, those seats that ARE occupied are usually done so by Japanese-Americans, Korean-Americans, Venezuelan-Americans, or Puerto Rican-Americans. The INS could likely meet their quota with a quick run through of PetCo Park during a Mexico-US game.

For the American TV viewer (i.e., where the money is) the WBC is hopelessly matched up against March Madness, despite honorable attempts to avoid direct scheduling conflicts. That, in turn, leads to odd start times and under-coverage. That's a recipe for disaster, ratings-wise.

The timing also sucks for the U.S. teams. At a time in spring training where pitchers are still limbering up their arms, they're asked to throw 100 competitive pitches against teams that have either already started their regular seasons, or are coming off two months of highly-competitive Winter League ball in Latin America.

Plus, there is the specter of baseball's declining popularity in America. This whole WBC concept was ginned up by Major League Baseball to spark domestic and international interest in the Grand Old Game. Baseball has been steadily declining on the American sports scene over the past 40 years---a gap that has been more-than-happily filled by the NFL and the NBA. It's great sin...baseball doesn't look good on TV.

As a baseball geek, I can't say I'm pleased---but as a realist, I can't say I'm surprised. As more and more American kids get soccer balls shoved in front of them, this trend will likely continue. American kids are less inclined to play a game where you can fail two-thirds of the time, and still be considered a spectacular success. A 67-percent failure rate is no way to attract modern-day kids.

Jeez, I'm sounding like a grumpy old man. GET OFF OF MY LAWN!!!

Played by the play-in game

OK---someone has yet to adequately explain this to me. What exactly is the purpose of the NCAA's play-in game? I'm talking about that little game being played tonight in Dayton---the one that sticks out like an abscess when you look at the bracket.

Storied powerhouses Morehead State and Alabama State will battle tonight for the right to say "We're #64!" As has been the case since this abomination was conceived more than a decade ago, the play-in game will be played in Dayton, Ohio. Their Chamber of Commerce must be positively tingling. They have doubtless netted billions of tourism dollars over the years with their annual "Battle for #64" tilt. The winner's reward will be a righteous ass-kicking later this week at the hands of Louisville.

How disheartening it must be for these small conference teams to win their conference tourneys and qualify for the "Mini-Dance." Fans storm the court, players are carried off like conquering heroes, they gather Sunday for the tournament selection show. They watch in stunned silence as they're relegated to the NCAA's version of purgatory.

And to add a racial element to all of this, why is it that one or both teams in the play-in game are almost always a HBCU? (Historically Black College or University) Black men CAN jump, can't they? Talk about "Separate, but Equal!" Somewhere, Spike Lee has a hard-on.

And why only one play-in game. Why not four? Make all of the 16 seeds advance following a play-in game? That would give three more at-large teams a chance to enter the field. While we're at it, why not expand the field to 128? To 256? Hell, let EVERYBODY in. I'd pay good money to see the 1-versus-64 matchup in the first round as UNC beats the New Jersey Institute of Technology by 70.

Hoop dreams

Thus begins March Madness. No. I'm not talking about the crazy weather we get this time of year. It's my latest excuse to veg out in front of the TV, drink copious amounts of beer, and ignore my wife and kids for as long as I can get away with it.

The funny thing is, I'm not that big of a college basketball fan. Sure, it beats soccer, tennis, ping-pong, jai alai, lacrosse, and watching flies fornicate. And of course I would follow the Hokies if they were competing in Parcheesi. But I don't live and die by the regular season. The Tournaments (ACC and NCAA) are fun, though.

The big reason I don't follow the regular season is that it is essentially meaningless, unlike my beloved College Football. Hoops are tournament-oriented. The best teams can lay a few eggs during the regular season, mail in a game or two, come out flat on occasion, and still make the field of 64. For all of the excitement generated by Duke and UNC's two regular-season matchups, nothing more than bragging rights and tournament seedings are at stake.

Now when Florida and Georgia football meet in October, there's more on the line that just whose fans can get the drunkest and come up with the most creative conjugation of a filthy verb. Lose this one, and you're toast as far as a national title is concerned. Oh sure, the Citrus Bowl still has a handsome payout. But if a loss to your arch-rival prevents you from playing in the BCS championship game, you're looking for a bottle of sleeping pills and a pint of bourbon.

If Duke drops two regular-season hoops games to Carolina, they're pissed, but they know full well they'll have a shot again in the tournament, if they keep winning.

Long live College Football, and a regular season where the games actually mean something! That having been said, let's open some beer and watch some hoops!

I want an Opt-Out clause

Is there any way I can opt out of Barack Obama’s version of “America?”

I’m sure if we wanted, we could eventually implement a quasi-socialist economic system like the majority of Americans seem to want these days. It could work, inasmuch as European economies work. That system would take half of your earnings, but would cover all of your health care needs, PAY YOU to go to college, subsidize four weeks of vacation and six months of pregnancy leave. You live out your days as a ward of The State---responsible for nothing more than deciding who to marry and how many kids to have. No need to worry about finding a good health insurance plan, the proper retirement fund, the best doctor to fit your needs. Sounds fun, doesn’t it?

The one thing it lacks is an opt-out provision.

Maybe I don’t want a portion of the money government takes from me to “bail-out” those who made mind-numbingly stupid decisions with their personal finances. Perhaps I would not rather subsidize corporations who have operated with a piss-poor business model for decades. Could it be that I’m just a tad leery of the same government that gave us the DMV and the IRS, being in charge of which doctor will operate on my heart one day?

You can argue details of the bailout, the stimulus, and the budget ‘til your face turns blue. The bottom line is that they represent every hard-core liberal’s wet dream---a fundamental shift in the way we think about our Federal Government. Does the government exist to serve us, or do we exist to serve the government?

These are not the best of times for conservative libertarians. While I would like to be able to say, “Thanks, but no thanks” to this trillion-dollar orgy, I don’t have that option. The Collective doesn’t function as well unless everyone participates.

About this blog...

I've avoided the whole "blog" thing for some time now. Every time I felt the need to rant about sports or politics, I just drank a few beers, looked at a few dirty pictures online, and called it a day.

As a conservative libertarian, I can no longer keep silent. (Cue the maniacal laughter!)

This blog will be mostly sports, some politics, and a lot of brain farts. Like my good friend, The Mom To Be Named Later, it'll also include some "keen" insights on raising hard-headed children.

Don't let the my first political diatribe post put you off. I will try to keep this mostly humorous. I'll also try to keep it fresh.